Day 151

I think we'll call this week 'the failed experiment'. For those of you who don't know, like an idiot, I started smoking again. I know, I know. While at Ft. Lewis I got a prescription for Chantix, which is an amazing thing. I used it and in no way, shape or form did I get ansty when I actually quit. It worked so well that about 5 days after I quit smoking I quit taking the pills. And then about 5 days after that, when all of the drug was out of my system, I started smoking again. So, last week Friday I went to the stop smoking class here, and got a prescription for Wellbutron. I started taking it Saturday and by Wednesday I was having some not-so-fun moments. When I got home from work that day, it felt as though my skin was trying to pull itself away from my body, and it took every ounce of energy I had to keep from crawling under my bed and assuming the fetal position. Not the best frame of mind to be in when bombs drop out of the sky every so often. I asked for Chantix but apparently the Army doesn't have any in Iraq, so it was the Wellbutron or nothing. I think smoking is better than that crap I was taking this week. All is well. I am chemical free and happy to be. You know, I got to the end of the last sentence and just couldn't figure out how to end it. I am certainly not happy to be here, but I am happy to be alive, with a future I like, with so many non-desert places to visit, with friends and family back home, I am just happy to be. Maybe that's the best way to end it. I think we'll leave it at that.